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The Pencil Today:

THE QUOTE

Acadame, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.” — Ambrose Bierce

SANDUSKY’S CO-CONSPIRATORS

“The most saddening finding by the Special Investigative Counsel is the total and consistent disregard by the most senior leaders at Penn State for the safety and welfare of Sandusky’s child victims.”

So there you have it. The official damnation of Penn State University by former FBI chief Louis Freeh’s gumshoes.

The Freeh report was released this morning.

And, no, this is no outside slam job. Freeh et al were hired by Penn State to dig into the sludge that threatens to drown the institution.

This is more satisfying even than the guilty verdict Jerry Sandusky earned after years of sodomizing 10-year-old boys. He’s a sick man. But his superiors at Penn State gave him license to fuck and blow children and to force them to blow him.

Now, riot over that one, Penn State faithful.

PSU Erected A Statue Of The Unindicted And Thankfully Dead Joe Paterno

DUMB TIMES

Have you caught Jimmie Walker’s latest act yet.

The “actor” who played JJ on the 70’s CBS-TV sitcom “Good Times” is doing the grand tour promoting his memoir. It’s called “Dyn-o-MITE: Good Times, Bad Times, Our Times,” the catchword, of course, being his great contribution to American culture.

Walker doesn’t like Barack Obama.

“Sometimes even a brother, you have to let him go,” Walker told Bill O’Reilly yesterday.

Walker, you may recall, won precisely zero Emmy Awards for his portrayal of a jiving, shucking Negro on the show. Walker’s JJ made Stepin Fetchit and Little Black Sambo look like George Washington Carver.

Now he’s talking politics. On Fox News, no less.

Oh, just a little irony here. Walker was the beneficiary of a Great Society program when he attended a federally-funded writing class for unemployed youth after he graduated from high school.

We taxpayers want our money back.

WE’RE NUMBER…, UM…, WHERE ARE WE?

Bummer!

Bloomington did not make the list of coolest college towns on Ranker.com.

Here they are, in order:

Georgetown Students Can See Mitch McConnell On The Streets On Any Given Day

The Tuscaloosa Motel 6

Honestly? Washington, DC?

Tuscaloosa?

Jeez, you’d think Leo Cook’s weekly Bloomington’s Got Talent! show at the Bluebird alone would earn us a spot on the list. Go figure.

Electron Pencil event listings: Music, art, movies, lectures, parties, receptions, games, benefits, plays, meetings, fairs, conspiracies, rituals, etc.

◗ IU Simon Music LibraryGuest lecturer Professor David Castilo speaks about 18th Century Brazilian music; 5pm

Bear’s PlaceJaniece Jaffe; 5:30pm

Janiece Jaffe

Third Street ParkOutdoor concert series, Bloomington Community Band; 6:30pm

◗ IU Ford HallLatin American Music Center Guest Series: Recordist David Castilo plays Brazilian music; 7PM

Muddy Boots Cafe, Nashville — Homebrew; 6-8:30pm

Panache DanceLocal First July mixer, wine, cheese, and Samba dancing; 7-8:30pm

◗ IU Wells-Metz TheatreMusical, “You Can’t Take It With You”; 7:30pm

Monroe County History CenterArchitectural history researcher Bill Coulter speaks about how to trace the history of your building; 7pm

The Player’s PubTwo for the Show; 8pm

◗ IU Auer HallSummer Music Series: Recital participants in the IU Summer Percussion Academy; 8pm

The Comedy AtticChelsea Peretti; 8pm

Chelsea Peretti

Serendipity Martini BarTeam trivia; 8:30pm

The BluebirdNew Old Cavalry; 9pm

Uncle Elizabeth’sKaraoke; 9pm

Ongoing:

◗ Ivy Tech Waldron CenterExhibits:

◗ IU Art MuseumExhibits:

◗ IU SoFA Grunwald GalleryExhibits:

◗ IU Kinsey Institute Gallery“Ephemeral Ink: Selections of Tattoo Art from the Kinsey Institute Collection”; through September 21st

◗ IU Lilly LibraryExhibit, “Translating the Canon: Building Special Collections in the 21st Century”; through September 1st

◗ IU Mathers Museum of World Cultures — Closed for semester break

Monroe County History Center Exhibits:

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