They tolled for me.
Yup. I had my last radiation and chemotherapy treatments today. I feel as though I’m in a dream.
When we pulled away from the infusion center at about 4:00pm, I was struck by the blue sky, the sunshine, the shoots poking up out of the soil, the yellow and purple flowers, the pedestrians — some of them — traipsing around without coats on. It’s the first full day of Spring, the season of rebirth. And I’m reborn, starting right now, ready to start healing, eager to eat and talk, hankering for a good long walk, wanting to go back to work and hanging out.
I have just gone 33-3, a memorable pitcher’s record indeed, but an even more amazing count of nukings and poisonings my body has withstood since this whole treatment regime began on Thursday, February 4th, 2016. Thirty-three radiation beams and three chemotherapy doses.
Both treatments have kicked the living shit out of me. I was driven at one point to want to quit the whole thing, throw up my hands, and say, “Let this goddamned Olive Pit™ kill me.”
But I hung in there. I have no idea how. I just did it.
The docs, Wu & Allerton, tell me I’m still in for some healthy portions of pain and discomfort over the next couple of weeks. I can bear it all so long as I know I won’t have to wake up tomorrow morning to go get zapped again or filled with more deadly platinum. The shit got real — but it has passed, babies!
Take a look at these photos of today’s events:
Tomorrow I’ll put up some videos — raw, jerky, utterly unprofessional — of the day’s festivities. WordPress doesn’t allow bloggers to post our own vids easily. I’ll have to upload my very short vids to my YouTube page (which takes thousands of years) and then I’ll have to paste those URLs in the Add Media function. I’m too tired for all that bullshit right now.
Anyway, here are some people whom I now love — even though I hardly know them:
The radiation center crew:
- Dr. Fred Wu
They are special people who earn their livings saving people’s lives.
The infusion center crew:
- Dr. Jeffrey Allerton
Not only do they save people’s lives, they take risks splashing themselves with ungodly toxic substances every day.
I love them all.
I also love Les Crandall and David and Susan Jones, dear pals who showed up today at the radiation center to celebrate my bell ringing with me.
I love all the folks on Facebook who posted pictures of or references to bellringing today.
Goddamn, I’m lucky.
I may still be under the thumb of the side effects of radiation and chemotherapy for a while but the truth is, I’ve never felt so free as I do this moment.
Peace, love & soul.