Overheard this AM at a diner:
Whatever happened to ol’ what’s his name?
Y’know, That Guy
Keller Converses On Big Talk
Do you ever wonder how all these different non-profit social service agencies get off the ground? Well, we’ve got one such genesis story right from the (clothes)horse’s mouth. My guest on Big Talk yesterday was Sandy Keller, founder and executive director of My Sister’s Closet. She and her crew have been outfitting and counseling at-risk women hoping to get into the workforce for nearly 20 years now.
Next week, we’ll gab with Dr. Maria Elizabeth Hamilton — known as Osunbimpe Abegunde — Indiana University visiting lecturer in African American and African Diaspora studies. She’s a researcher in ancestral memory
as well as a poet, birth doula, Reiki master, and engungun priest. I’m looking forward to this show because, frankly, I know next to nothing about any of those topics, so we can all look forward to becoming enlightened — and isn’t that why we’re alive?
Herein, I’m publishing the transcript of Kid Rock’s coming-out party speech. That is, coming out in terms of stating categorically he’s running for US Senator from Michigan.
Who knows what the future may hold. Hell, we might look back on this week and say, Ha! Kid Rock wanting to run for office — what a joke that was! Of course, the events of 2016 have proven that nothing is too ludicrous to happen in this holy land anymore. In either case, I want to make sure there’s a record of Kid Rock’s speech here.
So, here are the words of a man who wants to become member of America’s elite leadership body, and who makes no bones about looking ahead to the White House:
Date: Tuesday, September 12, 2017
Location: Little Caesar’s Arena, Detroit Michigan
Event: Inaugural concert in the new arena, starring Kid Rock
[Kid Rock sings one song, leaves the stage, and is immediately re-introduced.]
Emcee: “Ladies and Gentlemen. Will you please welcome, the next Senator of the great state of Michigan, Kid motherfucking Rock!”
The song, ”Hail to the Chief,” is played.
Graphic behind stage: “Kid Rock ’18 For U.S. Senate.”
Well, what a crowd! I said, ‘Well, what a crowd!’ What’s going on in the world today? Seems the government wants to give everyone health insurance, but wants us all to pay. To be very frank, I really don’t have a problem with that since God has blessed me and made my pockets fat. But, if redistribution of wealth seems more like their plan, then I don’t believe you should save, sacrifice, do things by the book and then have to take care of some dead beat, milking the system, lazy ass motherfucking man.
The issue of struggling single parents is an issue close to my heart. But, read my lips: We should not reward those who can’t even take care of themselves but keep having kid after fucking kid.
Of course we should help them out. I don’t want to stand here and sound like a jerk. But let’s help them out with child care, job training and find them a fucking place to work.”
And you deadbeat dads who refuse to be a man. Who refuse to be there for your sons and raise them up to be good men. You no-good derelict sperm donor wannabes. I say lock all you assholes up and throw away all the fucking keys.
If you want to take a knee or sit during our Star Spangled Banner, call me a racist because I’m not PC and remind me that Black lives matter. Nazis, fucking bigots and now again the KKK? I say fuck all you racists. Stay the hell away.
And why these days is everything so gay? Gay rights. Transgender this and that. I say let gay folks get married if they want and I’m not even close to a Democrat. But things shouldn’t be this complicated. And, no, you don’t get to choose, because whatever you have between your legs should determine the bathroom that you use.
It’s no secret we’re divided and we all should take some blame, and we all should be ashamed because we all seem scared to call him by his name. (Picture of Jesus appears; KR points at it) So, please almighty Jesus, if you’re looking down tonight, please guide us with your wisdom and give us strength to fight. To fight the tyrant evils that lurk here and abroad and remind us all we are still just one nation under God.
And I do believe it to be self-evident, that we are all created equal. I said it once, I’ll scream it again. I love black people. And, I love white people, too. But, neither as much as I love red, white and blue.
And, if Kid Rock said it, it’s got some folks in disarray, wait until they hear Kid Rock for President of the U-S-A!
‘Cause wouldn’t it be a sight to see. President Kid Rock in Washington, D.C. Standing on the desk in the Oval Office like a G. Holding my dick ready to address the whole country.
I’d look them straight in the eyes. The eyes of the nation live on TV. And Id say to them, “You ever met a motherfucker quite like me?”
Fingers crossed we’ll be laughing our heads off about this come November, 2018.