Category Archives: Isaac Asimov

1000 Words: Scientists Are People Too

The thing that appalled people most when Charles Darwin published his landmark 1859 book, On the Origin of Species, was their realization he was saying, in essence, humans are animals.

Darwin.

Hamlet, wallowing in his depression, poked fun at his species-mates’ vision of themselves:

What a piece of work is man!

How noble in reason!

How infinite in faculties!

In form and moving

How express and admirable!

In action how like an angel!

In apprehension how like a god!

The beauty of the world!

The mourning Danish prince meant precisely the opposite of what he was saying, but his words reflected what the vast majority off people then believed. That we humans are a cut above lions and tigers and bears. And turtles and slugs and gnats. Hell, bacteria and beetles as well. But especially chimps and gorillas and orangs, the critters who look and act most like us.

In this Year of Their Lord 2022, I’d go so far as to say most people alive today still hold in their hearts the idea that there are the animals and there are humans, and never the twain shall meet. A man running for a Georgia congressional seat named Herschel Walker, a former pro football star, scoffs at the whole idea of evolution. “Why are there still apes?” he asked during a March interview. Walker, BTW, is endorsed by none other than the 45th President of the United States of America. The former president, I’m thrilled to add.

Walker stands a good chance of re-taking the seat for the Republican Party. He’s tied in the opinion polls with incumbent Raphael Warnock (D-GA). That means a hell of a lot of people in his district don’t care that he’s blissfully unknowledgeable about, and even contemptuous of, one of humanity’s bedrock scientific premises.

Walker, Proudly Uninformed.

For pity’s sake, should Walker proclaim tomorrow that gravity is a hoax his poll numbers wouldn’t budge an inch.

We might comfort ourselves by saying evolution deniers and the rest simply are uneducated. Largely, that’s true. There is, as Isaac Asimov and Susan Jacoby have observed, a deep and historical vein of anti-intellectualism and anti-science in this holy land.

Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that “my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.” — Asimov

This mindless tolerance, which places observable scientific facts, subject to proof, on the same level as unprovable supernatural fantasy, has played a major role in the resurgence of both anti-intellectualism and anti-rationalism. — Jacoby.

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Funny thing was, the people who most loudly and vehemently pilloried Darwin for his groundbreaking idea were the scientists of the day. Same thing happened to a fellow named Alfred Wegener, a German scientist who, in 1912, proposed that the continents were floating around the Earth like life rafts. The science establishment at the time found his hypothesis inane. Some fellow scientists declared his ideas “delirious ravings.”

Nikola Tesla was ridiculed by mainstream researchers also fiddling around with electricity during his time. Tesla, in fact, was squashed by the predatory and insatiable patent acquisitor Thomas Edison, who used Tesla’s unfortunate mental illnesses against him. It was like saying Nina Simone was a lousy singer because she was bipolar and suffered PTSD.

Take the case of a 19th century Hungarian obstetrician named Ignaz Semmelweis. Every OB/Gyn of his day wondered why childbirth was such a risky endeavor for women, all women, poor and rich, educated and not, in every country on Earth. Well, at least all woman whose deliveries were assisted by doctors. Imagine that — having a licensed, trained medical professional guiding you through the process of birth actually put your life at risk. The lightbulb went on over Semmelweis’s head in 1847 when he published a paper suggesting doctors’ dirty hands were responsible for the trouble. He proposed a ludicrously simple solution: doctors should wash their hands! Semmelweis’s advice was pretty much ignored for years. He was incarcerated against his will in a mental institution at the end of his life.

A Simple Solution.

Which, itself, raises the point that many people throughout history who’ve advanced groundbreaking discoveries or advocated for huge social change were either actually mentally ill or labeled as such by the establishment. It often takes, after all, someone who’s been kicked out of “normal” society to be able to proclaim its dearly-held practices or treasured beliefs are wrong. Think John Brown and so many others. But that’s a discussion for another post.

This post, though, was inspired by a couple of gorgeous videos I discovered this past weekend. One covers the discovery that an enormous asteroid crashed into the Earth some 65 million years ago, wiping out many of the planet’s animal and plant species including, famously, the dinosaurs.

The Chicxulub Crater, on the Yucatan Peninsula and in the Gulf of Mexico.

It took the combined efforts of geophysicists Antonio Camargo-Zanoguera and Glen Penfield as well as those of Walter and Luis Alvarez, son and father, geologist and physicist, respectively, over a period of a decade to establish that, indeed a massive hunk of rock had crashed into the Earth and thrown up an unimaginably gigantic cloud of debris, blocking out the Sun, causing plant photosynthesis to mostly cease, starving plant-eating animals and, subsequently, meat-eaters. Some 75 percent of the species on Earth died out, leaving tiny, skittering, bug-eating critters like early mammals among those that survived. Those mammals then evolved into more complex forms.

It can be said that had the Chicxulub Crater impact never happened, humans wouldn’t have come into being.

But again, scientists who’d been brought up to believe the Earth and life’s history was a glacially slow process with minute, incremental changes rejected any notion that a catastrophic event bringing about dramatic changes in the land or the critters living on it could have occurred .

Those scientists resisted with all their might Camargo-Zanoguera’s, Penfield’s and the Alvarezes’ findings.

So many times throughout history new discoveries have not been accepted by the old guard until that generation died out. They cling to their old ways of thought as desperately as they cling to their own youth. It still happens today.

So, here’s the first video, an explanation of how the Chicxulub Crater was discovered and the development of the dinosaur extinction theory, followed by a beautiful imagining of what the asteroid looked like, in real time, as it descended from space and crashed into the Earth.  I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.

 

 

What Is Science?

There are any number of terms and/or concepts bandied about these days that mean many different things to many different people. One of the important features of clear language is the understanding that we all pretty much agree on what words mean. I use the qualifier “pretty much” because definitions shouldn’t be written in stone, impervious to lexicographical evolution. But if I say to you, “Watch out, there’s an angry hornet on your right shoulder,” it’d behoove you to know that yours and my definitions of “right,” “shoulder,” and “hornet” jibe.

Awful [Image: Fotolia/AP]

All languages are fluid, constantly changing. English is no better or worse, in that sense, than any other tongue. Take, for instance, the words terrific and awful. Anybody today who uses either term is conveying a meaning that everybody would get. Something terrific is good to an almost superlative degree. Something awful is bad, to the same extent. Yet terrific originally denoted something that inspired terror. Awful, on the other hand, described a thing or idea that filled one with awe, the interior, say, of the Ulm Cathedral in Germany, once one of the tallest structures in the world. Its stone steeple reaches 530 feet into the sky. Imagine being a rustic Briton in pre-skyscraper days, arriving in the Teutonic big city and strolling up to the edifice. She or he’d be filled with awe. “This,” she’d say, “is awful!”

Back then, those within earshot’d know precisely what she meant.

If she said the same thing today, listeners would be scratching their heads.

And, by the way, most people refer to that structure, officially the Ulm Minster, as a cathedral but, truth is, it is no such thing. A cathedral, technically, is the home church of a bishop, the headquarters of what is called in the Christian nomenclature a See.

See? A didact from the Holy See (the official name of the sovereign state whose capital is the Vatican City), might shake his finger at you for calling the Ulm structure a cathedral, but no one else on Earth would. That bit of inexactness (or, some might say, laziness) among the hoi polloi has led to an effective change in the meaning of the word cathedral. Most people today would say it refers to any grand or awe-inspiring church.

For pity’s sake, the very term hoi polloi itself can mean something quite different from the original intent. About 75 years ago, the term meant the unwashed masses, rubes, un-sophisticates, the common clay. As such, obviously, it was a slur. People of a certain “noble” rank used it to describe the slobs of no rank or wealth they had to suffer seeing whenever they ventured out from their safe estates. Pretty straightforward, no?

No. Here’s the Merriam-Webster definition of the term hoi polloi:

  1. The general populace. The masses
  2. People of distinction or wealth or elevated social status. Elite.

Well, which is it?

Fortunately for us in the year 2021, few use the term. It, again, is an insult. Perhaps it fell out of fashion because nobody could could guess with any assurance what you meant when you uttered it.

Back when I was a kid, white people started copping terms from black people, who themselves had been copping terms from jazz hipsters. One of them was bad, as in good. My father and brother used to whip themselves into a frenzy watching the Chicago Bears play football every fall Sunday afternoon. One day, my brother said of Dick Butkus, the legendary Hall of Fame middle linebacker whose very name at the time conjured an image of the immovable barrier, the unforgiving force or, simply, the best pro football defender alive, “Man, he’s bad!”

My father, not yet hip, was flummoxed. You could almost see the wheels spinning within his head: Butkus? Bad?

I could go on. Hipster once was a descriptor most wannabe cool guys would have loved to be called. Anybody who played bebop jazz or listened to it was a hipster. Charlie Parker was a hipster. Lenny Bruce was a hipster. The Beat Writers were hipsters. Outsiders, rebels, anti-establishment types. Today? Let’s go to the Wikipedia reference, Hipster (contemporary subculture):

Affluent or middle class youth?! Charlie Parker? Lenny Bruce? Allen Ginsberg?

Like I said, language is fluid. Dig?

This, natch, is all preamble to the question, What is science? This is important because people are using the term promiscuously in public discourse, on social media, and in their own minds. In fact, the very word has become a definitive marker as emotionally and forensically fraught as religion once was (and, to a vanishing extent, remains). When someone says “That’s just science,” they’re really saying, “That’s the truth, and if you don’t believe it, you’re not going to hell but, man, you’re out of it.”

Problem is, people who buy into astrology, for instance, will argue that the practice of it and belief in it is firmly grounded in science. They’ll say people have been working on its charts and formulae for thousands of years. It’s a noble and entrenched science.

Anti-vaxxers swear to their gods that they have science on their side. Those who believe genetically modified organisms (GMOs) are poison say their stance is science-based. Conspiracy theorists explain the origin of COVID-19, the collapse of several Manhattan skyscrapers after the 9/11 attack, even the idea that John F. Kennedy was, as The Onion headline blared, “shot 129 times from 43 different angles while riding through downtown Dallas in a motorcade,” will tell you, That’s just science.

In each of the aforementioned cases scientific consensus held an opposing view.

The word science today too often connotes Received Wisdom just as much as the Bible or the pronouncements of the Rev. Sun Myung Moon once meant to their adherents. In many cases, science is the new Bible; scientists the new priests. The hoi polloi (there’s that word again) casually surf the internet and, finding some quote or assertion by a white lab coat-wearing figure, accept the same without question.

Science, in millions and millions of people’s minds, is now orthodoxy.

Like so many terms, so many ideas, science today is becoming meaningless.

Which is a damned shame because, not terribly long ago (before the Age of Trump and, to be sure, before the advent of the internet) the word had a hard and fast meaning.

People say, “Science says…,” as if there’s some authority, some panel of infallible experts who speak in its name. As if all the scientists of the world are in lock-step agreement on things. As if there’s a daily or weekly report issued by them, the purpose of which is to posit inerrant truths.

Thing is, scientists are nothing more than a bunch of human beings trying to do the best they can in their chosen fields. There are good ones; there are lousy ones. This is not to belittle their efforts. But it can be assumed that if 90 percent or more of the practitioners in any scientific discipline buy into an idea, it’s likely spot on. Of course, scientific consensus has been wrong before. Many times, in fact. Think of things like phrenology, social “survival of the fittest,” Piltdown Man, the Steady State universe, and many other now-debunked but one-time accepted truths.

Oliver G. Alvar wrote in 2019:

Science makes mistakes, there’s no doubt about it. If it claimed to possess perfect knowledge of the world, it would be no better than religion or other dogmatic doctrines. Unlike religion, science doesn’t deal in absolutes, but in probabilities — which is how we conduct our everyday knowledge anyway.

Science is humanity’s accumulated body of knowledge, ever-changing, constantly being refined, the particulars within it occasionally refuted. With each passing day practitioners of experience, capability, and acclaim within it are trying to make it better, more accurate, closer to the truth. The best of scientists innately grasp that they’ll never fully know any “truth,” yet, they still strive toward it.

They do their work following the guidelines of the scientific method. It’s utterly logical and exquisitely simple. Here’s a chart I found in the website Lumen:

You see the box reading “Form a hypothesis…?” That’s a term people usually conflate with theory. “That’s your theory,” people might say when they’re really implying, “You’re full of shit.” A hypothesis is a guess based on observation, an unproven stab. A theory is a hypothesis that has been either proven or shown to be so overwhelmingly unassailable that it works quite well as a model of understanding, evolution, say, or the Big Bang.

In any case, scientists are not the spiritual kin of Moses, who came down from Mount Sinai carrying the Ten Commandments. People throughout history have craved such a prophet, such a visionary, certain of “truth.” They still do today. If anything, the impulse within us to embrace such a man (always a man) is less in the year 2021 than it was in 1921 or, for that matter, 1121 or 1121 BCE. That’s good. Yet it remains.

Moses, essentially, said, This is so. Ideally, scientists say, This just might be.

Leave it to Isaac Asimov to put it best:

The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not “Eureka” but “That’s funny…”

Asimov

Good scientists that he was, Asimov got a bigger kick out of being puzzled by something than he got from finding any sort of “truth.”

The Pencil Today:

THE QUOTE

“Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.” — Milan Kundera

KICK UP YOUR SHOES

We need easy to digest aphorisms, quotes, comments, and charts today. Which is code for: I’m too lazy to come up with original stuff.

It’s a glorious Saturday morning, with the Grant Street Jazz festival set to begin in a couple of hours. See GO!, below, for the the lineup. Today’s GO! is chock-full of things to do — it’s the best events listing in Bloomington, kiddies.

Summer, at last, is enjoyable — as opposed to the earthly hell it’s been for a few months now.

BTW: Woodstock wound down 43 years ago yesterday. Today would have been the anniversary of the most miserable cleanup imaginable.

So let’s be thankful we don’t have to fish missing car keys out of LSD-tainted mud.

Edward R. Murrow:

Ha-Joon Chang:

UPWORTHY:

ISAAC ASIMOV:

VOLTAIRE:

STEPHEN FRY:

Dustin Glick:

Here’s how I waste my time. How about you? Share your fave sites with us via the comments section. Just type in the name of the site, not the url; we’ll find them. If we like them, we’ll include them — if not, we’ll ignore them.

I Love ChartsLife as seen through charts.

XKCD — “A webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math, and language.”

SkepchickWomen scientists look at the world and the universe.

IndexedAll the answers in graph form, on index cards.

Indexed

I Fucking Love ScienceA Facebook community of science geeks.

Present & CorrectFun, compelling, gorgeous and/or scary graphic designs and visual creations throughout the years and from all over the world.

Flip Flop Fly BallBaseball as seen through infographics, haikus, song lyrics, and other odd communications devices.

Mental FlossFacts.

SodaplayCreate your own models or play with other people’s models.

Eat Sleep DrawAn endless stream of artwork submitted by an endless stream of people.

Big ThinkTapping the brains of notable intellectuals for their opinions, predictions, and diagnoses.

Click For Full Article

The Daily PuppySo shoot me.

Electron Pencil event listings: Music, art, movies, lectures, parties, receptions, games, benefits, plays, meetings, fairs, conspiracies, rituals, etc.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Frank Southern Ice ArenaBloomington Community Yard Sale; 8am

City Hall, Showers PlazaFarmers Market; 8am-1pm

Monroe County Public LibraryBasic Literacy Tutor Training, 1st of 4 sessions, call 812.349.3173 to register; 9:30am-1:30pm

Tibetan Mongolian Buddhist Cultural CenterOne-Day Retreat: Introuduction to Buddhist Philosophy in Daily Life, led by Ani Choekye; 10am-4:30pm

City Hall, Showers PlazaCommunity Volunteer Fair, +40 nonprofit organizations represented; 10am-1pm

Monroe County Courthouse — Backstreet Missions Fundraiser: A Slice of Heaven, homemade pies; 11am-3pm

First Church of God, Ellettsville — Classic Car Show; 1-4pm

◗ Grant Street between Kirkwood and 6th — Grant Street Jazz Festival, featuring:

  • Mayo Jazz

  • Paul Kirk & Dave Bruker Duo

  • Craig Brenner Duo

  • Monika Herzig Trio featuring Janiece Jaffe

  • Jazz Fables led by David Miller

  • Postmodern Jazz Quartet led by Jeff Isaac

  • Café Cubano

  • IU Jazz Faculty: Pat Harbison, Tom Walsh, Luke Gillespie, Jeremy Allen, Steve Houghton, Michael Spiro;

  • 1:30-11pm

Trained Eye ArtsWriters Guild Social & open mic, potluck snacks & beverages, 3-minute readings of original writings; 3pm

◗ IU CinemaLive action shorts from 2012 Seattle Children’s Film Festival; 3pm

HousebarEnd of Summer Gala, food, alcohol, live music:

  • Tim Baker

  • Deadghost

  • The Vorticists

  • Jerome and the Psychics

  • !mindparade

  • Elephant Quiz;

  • 5-11pm

◗ IU Fine Arts Theater — Ryder Film Series, “The Well Digger’s Daughter”; 6:45pm

◗ IU CinemaFilm: “Beasts of the Southern Wild”; 7pm

Muddy Boots Cafe, Nashville — Travis Creek; 7-9pm

Max’s PlaceSuzette Weakley, Broken Fences; 7-9pm

◗ IU Wells-Metz TheatreDrama, “Solana”; 7:30pm

Brown County Playhouse, Nashville — Dave England & the Haters, Forest Gras Experience; 7:30pm

◗ IU Woodburn Hall Theater — Ryder Film Series, “The Pigeoneers”; 8pm

The Comedy AtticNick Griffin; 8pm

Bear’s PlaceWilliams & Company; 8pm

◗ IU Fine Arts Theater — Ryder Film Series, “Polisse”; 8:45pm

Max’s PlaceHoney Locusts; 9-11pm

The BluebirdDot Dot Dot; 9pm

The BishopBobby Bare Jr., Prayer Breakfast; 9:30pm\

Muddy Boots Cafe, Nashville — Cootie; 9:30-11:30pm

The Root Cellar at Farm Bloomington — Oldies Night: Elvis, Beatles & Stones Dance Party; 10pm

The Comedy AtticNick Griffin; 10:30pm

Max’s PlaceCarpenter & Clerk; 11pm

ONGOING:

◗ Ivy Tech Waldron CenterExhibits:

  • “40 Years of Artists from Pygmalion’s”; through September 1st

◗ IU Art MuseumExhibits:

  • “A Tribute to William Zimmerman,” wildlife artist; through September 9th

  • Willi Baumeister, “Baumeister in Print”; through September 9th

  • Annibale and Agostino Carracci, “The Bolognese School”; through September 16th

  • “Contemporary Explorations: Paintings by Contemporary Native American Artists”; through October 14th

  • David Hockney, “New Acquisitions”; through October 21st

  • Utagawa Kuniyoshi, “Paragons of Filial Piety”; through fall semester 2012

  • Julia Margaret Cameron, Edward Weston, & Harry Callahan, “Intimate Models: Photographs of Husbands, Wives, and Lovers”; through December 31st

  • “French Printmaking in the Seventeenth Century”; through December 31st

◗ IU SoFA Grunwald GalleryExhibits:

  • Coming — Media Life; August 24th through September 15th

  • Coming — Axe of Vengeance: Ghanaian Film Posters and Film Viewing Culture; August 24th through September 15th

◗ IU Kinsey Institute Gallery“Ephemeral Ink: Selections of Tattoo Art from the Kinsey Institute Collection”; through September 21st

◗ IU Lilly LibraryExhibit, “Translating the Canon: Building Special Collections in the 21st Century”; through September 1st

◗ IU Mathers Museum of World CulturesClosed for semester break, reopens Tuesday, August 21st

Monroe County History CenterPhoto exhibit, “Bloomington: Then and Now” by Bloomington Fading; through October 27th

The Pencil Today:

THE QUOTE

“I believe in evidence. I believe in observation, measurement, and reasoning, confirmed by independent observers. I’ll believe anything, no matter how wild and ridiculous, if there is evidence for it. The wilder and more ridiculous something is, however, the firmer and more solid the evidence will have to be.” — Isaac Asimov

ARBUSTO BUSTLE

A Bush is saying the GOP is whacked out?

The Republicans are “dysfunctional” and “disturbing,” according to Jeb Bush?

At this point the only reason Rod Serling is not the spokesperson for the Republicans is that he’s long dead. Come to think of it, they ought to use old film of him anyway.

“Welcome to the 2012 Republican National Convention….”

CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE

h/t to Hondo Thompson for the Asimov quote above.

Hondo

PUT ON YOUR SUNDAY BEST

Click.

FLIPPIN’ BURGERS FOR THE MAN

Does this surprise you?

McDonald’s, Applebee’s, Wendy’s, Pizza Hut, Chuch E. Cheese, and Burger King are among the worst restaurant chains to work for, according to a poll by the Restaurant Opportunities Center-United, an advocacy group for food workers.

Nothing Like Associating Your Restaurant With A Rat

At the very least, the unflattering, uncomfortable, chintzy-cheap uniforms those outfits make their wage-slaves wear is abusive enough.

I’ll scarf a Big Mac or a Whopper on occasion but I will not — repeat, will not! — allow a Pizza Hut, er, thing to touch my lips.

The inclusion of one restaurant on the list did bum me out, though. Uno Chicago Grill made it. Too bad. Excellent pizza.

NINE REASONS TO KEEP ON LIVING

As long as we’re on the topic, here’s are my fave Chicago pizzas, in no particular order:

Coalfire Pizza With Basil

Gino’s East Deep Dish

Next time you head up north, go to one of these places. Except for Uno’s. Let’s let them treat their people a little better before we toss them any more of our dough.

The Pencil Today:

THE QUOTE

“Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that ‘my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.'” — Isaac Asimov

MIKE ELK SPEAKS

Studs Terkel, in his book “Talking To Myself: A Memoir of My Times” writes that the best reporter is the one who asks the impertinent question.

Studs Terkel

As you know, if you’ve been paying any attention at all, reporters today ask mostly gotcha questions, the kind they know the answer to already but are designed simply to embarrass the subject, or softball questions that even the editor of a high school newspaper should be embarrassed to ask.

Let’s go a step further. Linda Ellerbee once wrote that if she hadn’t made someone feel uncomfortable in her reporting for the day, she felt as though she hadn’t done her job.

Linda Ellerbee

Then, of course, early 20th Century newspaperman Finley Peter Dunne said the job of the the journalist is to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.

Mike Elk yesterday asked an impertinent question (actually, two), made a bunch of people feel uncomfortable, and afflicted a big shot.

Bingo! The man is a three-time winner.

Elk got up yesterday at a business/political masturbatory press event in Washington where the big boss of Honeywell International, David Cote, expected to be lavished with praise for…, um, well, for being the big boss of Honeywell.

See, Honeywell sachems were also scheduled to guide Barack Obama around by the elbow at the company’s headquarters in the appropriately named Golden Valley, Minnesota, so both the prez and the company could tell the world how wonderful they both are.

Only Mike Elk elected not to play the game. He took the audience microphone and referred to a Fortune Magazine handjob article about Honeywell and Cote, wherein the boss crowed what terrific corporate citizens he and his outfit are. Then Elk flung two impertinent questions at Cote: one about Honeywell’s union busting practices (the company’s Metropolis, Illinois, plant first locked out, then axed 1400 union workers) and the other about a possible radiation leak there. The idea being, those aren’t the acts of nice neighbors.

Well, the assembled reporters, PR flaks, pols, and execs gasped, we never!

Elk got the mic yanked out of his hand and he was given the thumb. When he protested that he was a reporter and showed his credentials, one woman’s off-screen voice can be heard saying, “That’s not a member of the press from the Hill; this is a member of the press.” Presumably, she’s pointing at some well-behaved media stenographer who’ll only ask Cote what wondrous things he and Honeywell have done lately.

Tell Me, Mr. Cote, What’s It Like To Be You?

In fact, after Elk was given the bum’s rush, another person got up and said, “One of the things I’m concerned about is, the, um, y’know, the unemployment rate for African American young people is — I don’t know whether this is true, it says 38 percent? — and, um, my son was an all-best high school….” Here, the vid ends, cutting her off in mid-interrogation, which is too bad because it seemed to be the preamble for an all-time great softball question.

The speaker clearly was telling the assembled multitude how fabulous her kid is and then probably was going to ask what Honeywell proposed to do about putting such fine young lads to work in plush corner offices ASAP. Then Cote could tell her how terrific Honeywell is at hiring African-Americans and all other people who were born with brown skin. Then everybody could have glowed and grinned, the men could arrange a circle jerk and the woman could have a group hug.

We’re fabulous!

I thank the god I don’t believe in that I never was able to fit into a corporation environment like Honeywell’s.

BTW: I love how the woman wonders if it’s true that unemployment among African-American young people could possibly be 38 percent. It introduces just the right amount of faux-skepticism about a real problem that could just as easily have been described as “the historically persistent high levels of joblessness among young blacks.”

Man, the corporate world demands an unconscionable amount of toadiness — not only from its paid minions but from the public at large.

Be thankful Mike Elk is not a toady.

On the other hand, Elk never got answers to his questions and most of the mainstream news yesterday was about the Obama tour of the Honeywell plant. So score one for the corporatocracy versus the impertinent journalist.

LEO’S BLOOMINGTON (OR IS IT BLOOMINGTON’S LEO?)

Leo D. Cook ought to be granted the title of Mr. Bloomington here and now.

Wouldn’t he be perfect as the local radio or TV host who interviews all the fascinating characters who live in and pass through this bustling metrop?

The Definitive Leo D. Cook Photoshopped Photo

He could tell stories, draw the people out, and otherwise create a weekly hour’s worth of whacked-out chat. Can you imagine a show with the guests Steve Volan, Jeremy Gotwals, and, say, Lynda Barry, who’s in town for this coming week’s IU Writers Conference?

People In Our Listening Area Are Advised To Take Cover

That conversation might be declared a hazardous incident site by FEMA. Or it could be great radio.

Anyway, Leo’s long-range plan to attain celebrity takes another step forward this coming week with the commencement of “Bloomington’s Got Talent,” a weekly talent (duh) show at The Bluebird. The thing will run every Tuesday night through the summer. Leo will emcee.

Registration begins at 9:30pm with the first acts going onstage at 10.

TURN OFF YOUR TV — GO OUT

Lots to do this weekend. Luckily, you’ve got the Pencil’s GO! events listings. Click the logo. Follow instructions.

SUMMER SOFT

It’s June. The blazing days are coming. But it’s perfect out right now.

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