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THE QUOTE
“Read The Electron Pencil everyday, especially now that we have daily event listings. Scroll down to our Go section. What are you waiting for?” — Big Mike Glab
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WORK, WORK, WORK, WORK, WORK….
So, Bloomington has been blessed by Parade Magazine as the fourth-hardest working town in these Great United States, Inc.
I don’t know if Bloomingtonians are dancing in the streets just yet (I’m still sitting in my underwear in my garage office typing out this bilge, after all) but I’m going to have to dump some cold water on all the glee.
Typical Monday Morning In Bloomington
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What in the world does this arbitrary list mean? Do the people of, say, Santa Clause, Indiana, which is not on the list, just sit around dreaming of Christmas? Does the populace of Hoboken, New Jersey refuse to work because they’re busy listening to hometown boy Frank Sinatra’s records?
“I Just Don’t Have The Time To Work.”
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Here’s the most troubling thing about Parade’s survey and findings: Bloomington ranked so high mainly because our citizens are, as a group, the most willing in the United States to work weekends (“an astounding 15 points above the national average”).
Ever since unions started becoming unfashionable and workers rights turned into a pie-in-the-sky ideal in this Land of Reagan, Americans have been compelled to work longer hours and sacrifice more of their personal and family lives for employers who have been laying them off as never before. The weekend as well as the lunch hour and, for that matter, even an uninterrupted dinner have come to be viewed as luxuries.
I wouldn’t throw a party for the Parade ranking.
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READ TO LIVE — LIVE TO READ
Happy World Book and Copyright Day!
Bet you didn’t know this holiday existed. Unless I missed the news, I don’t think there’ll be a parade down Kirkwood Avenue today in honor of it.
Why Not?
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Here’s what I suggest you do — take your favorite book to work or school today and just give it to somebody. It could be a stranger or your best friend. No matter, just give her or him a book.
And if the loss of the book makes you feel deprived, I have a simple remedy for that, as well. Go to your local independent bookseller (he he) and buy a new one.
Simple, no?
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WELL, I NEVER!
So, John Edwards goes on trial today for the heinous crime of conspiring to conceal his extramarital affair during his aborted presidential run in 2008. Additionally, the Secret Service/prostitutes scandal continues to race along.
This weekend whiny Joe Lieberman, Independent (read: incapable of commitment) senator from Connecticut, wagged his finger and revealed that one of the offending Secret Service agents actually stayed at the hotel where President Obama was scheduled to occupy when he arrived in Colombia. The horror!
Lieberman: They Had Sex, Those Fiends!
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Other than obvious atrocities like shooting an unarmed black teenager on a dark street in a white neighborhood or Mel Gibson offering his opinion on anything, the worst thing you can do in this holy land is have anything other than missionary position sex outside the sacred bonds of marriage.
Ergo, Secret Service agents have been fired and may yet be prosecuted and a presidential candidate whose top talking point was the poor eventually may be sentenced to time in the joint.
Meanwhile, these fine citizens continue to roam the streets freely:
The Unindicted
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Electron Pencil event listings: Music, art, movies, lectures, parties, receptions, benefits, plays, meetings, fairs, conspiracies, rituals, etc.
Monday, April 23, 2012
◗ Bloomington, Citywide — IU’s Arts Week Everywhere 2012; Ongoing, various times
◗ The Kinsey Institute Gallery — “Man as Object: Reversing the Gaze,” exhibit, art by women examining men; Ongoing
From the “Man as Object” Exhibition
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◗ IU Memorial Union, State Room East — Lecture, Dr. Joseph Collentine, chair of Modern Languages at Northern Arizona University, “On the Compatibility between SLA Corpus and Variationist Research”; 2:30pm
◗ IU Asian Culture Center — Henna 101 with introduction and hands-on application; 5:30pm
◗ IU Auditorium — “Spirit of Indiana Showcase,” annual student-athlete awards gala; 6:30pm
◗ Bell Trace Health and Living Center — “Life in a British Period Drama,” 4-session class on British class life; 6:30pm
◗ Madame Walker Theatre Center — Auditions for “Queen Esther — A Fearless Shero”; 6-8pm
◗ IU Hutton Honors College, Great Room — Indiana Review Editors Showcase; 7-8:30pm
◗ The Player’s Pub — Songwriter Showcase; 8pm
◗ The Bishop — No Requests with DJ Burke; 8pm
◗ The Bluebird — Dave Walters Karaoke; 8pm
◗ The Bishop — Spirit of ’68 Presents: WOODS with Mmoss & Apache Dropout; 9pm
◗ The Bluebird — Laidback Luke; 9pm
Laidback Luke
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